Stress, stress and more stress

Okay, so not much to report this week. I guess Birth Mom and Birth Dad have already signed some paperwork regarding their intent to relinquish the child. SO, that is something. But it really doesn’t mean much, because they can still change their minds up until the actual termination of their parental rights. But, still… its something!

The agency asked if they could give my phone number to birth Mom (YES! Duh…), but I have not heard from her yet. I am still hopeful that we can build a good relationship and I am really trying to not read too much into these early meetings/conversations. I need to keep reminding myself that our great relationship with our daughters birth mom took time. This one will too. Just breathe.

We have not heard anymore from birth dad either, But we did extend an invitation through the agency for them to come over to our house one weekend in May. We would love to meet more members of the family and get to know them better. They do seem like really nice, down-to-earth folks. I hope they accept and we can meet on a more casual level -rather than at the agency, surrounded by social workers!

I suppose that birth mom is thinking about her birth plan and hopefully in the next few weeks we will have some idea as to how it will go at the hospital. Whether or not she wants us to be there at all, if she wants us in the room (like we were with our daughter), if the hospital will allow our daughter to be there (since she is not technically a sibling) … those sorts of things. Our last experience in the hospital with our daughters birth was pretty bad, but most of the bad parts were due to total incompetence with the agency/social workers we used for her adoption. We are using a different agency this time and I hope it will go better!

I have stressed myself out so much this last month or so that I made myself physically ill this week. I felt like I had been hit by a truck. Muscle aches, headache, general grumpiness, even a bit of a fever. I have GOT to figure out how to let some of this stuff go! So, in an effort to accomplish that – I am trying hard this week to focus on getting ready for our family vacation to Mexico coming up April 14. It should be a nice, fun trip! I know our daughter is very excited about going to the beach and now that she is pool-safe I might be able to relax a bit by the pool instead of chasing after her constantly :). I know that my sweet husband is glad to get some spring golfing in and he certainly deserves a break too. If I get one afternoon at the spa all to myself, cocktails by the pool in the evenings and at least one day to sleep in then I will consider the vacation a success.



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