Week number one…

My husband and I adopted our fist child in January of 2009 through an open adoption. The process for domestic open adoption is, as I like to call it… NOT for sissies. We adore our childs birthfamily and love having an open relationship with them. It truly is a blessing to have so many in our lives who love our child. We would not have done it any other way the second time around, but it is hard. Really hard.

We have been waiting for almost 2 years to get the call that we had been chosen my a birthfamily for a second child. That call came on Saturday, February 23 2013.

I want to be excited about this, really I do. But at this moment, I don’t see the joy of the journey, all I see is the shit that can go wrong. And I feel guilty because I don’t feel excited. I should be giddy! I should be shopping for onsies and painting the nursery, but instead… I can’t even make myself tell anyone yet. I just feel so scared right now.
We meet the birthparents in about 10 days, maybe that will help ease my mind a bit? Maybe then I will feel like a real choice has been made and that we are really going to finally be a family of four. Maybe.
Thanks for listening, wish us luck đŸ˜‰

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This entry was posted in open adoption, adoptive parent, adoption. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Week number one…

  1. Jessa says:

    Let yourself be as you are today. Accept what you feel in your body and mind, without feeling the need to fight it, deny it, ignore it, hide it, or push through to the other side. You don’t need to be giddy…not right now. That WILL come with time, no worries there. NOT for sissies and LOTS of emotions…YES. Cautiously optimistic….one step at a time. xo

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